Last year during walks with a friend of mine, we always talked about what people have to do to eat right and stay healthy. On one of our walks I remember her telling me that it’s hard to lose weight simply because we listen to other people instead of our bodies. She said when you ask whether you want something to eat, women will typically always tell you to eat more.

Since then, I’ve really noticed that. When I would ask my roommate or sister, “Do I really want popcorn for the movie?” or “Do I want a bedtime snack?” the answer would almost always be “yes.” Even when I’m not hungry, I’ll take their answer as a legitimate reason to dig in.

I don’t know that they’re purposely trying to sabotage my diet, but rather we all want to feel like we’re all on the same playing field. If person X eats a bedtime snack, then it’s okay for me to eat something, too. Or we feel better about the slip-up we had earlier in the day. Men, it seems, don’t worry

I noticed this theory in practice yesterday during the Fourth of July festivities. While watching fireworks from our deck, my sister decided to bring out more potato salad. A friend brought out a bratwurst. The other brought out a piece of corn on the cob. I asked if I wanted something to eat, and they all said yes. After all, it was the Fourth of July.

Why did they all say yes? Why did I even ask? I knew I wasn’t hungry and had my fair share of fatty yet oh-so-good food all day long. Why do we ask, and why do we always want the answer to be yes? Is it a way to justify it to ourselves? Is it a way to take the guilt and blame off ourselves and onto our friends?

My three roommates have high metabolism and are fairly thin. For some reason, when they eat, I think it’s okay for me to eat too. After all, they’re thin. But what I fail to realize sometimes is that our bodies respond differently. While my roommate can eat three brownies and not gain a pound, mine will invariably end up in my thighs or stomach.

So next time you wonder if you should be eating, don’t ask people. Ask yourself. Listen to your body and see if you’re really hungry. Don’t rely on other people’s opinions or have them justify what you’re eating. They don’t know what your body needs. Only you can be the judge of that.